Sunday, October 5, 2008

Sometimes Life is Stormy

One of the sometimes great things about living where I live in Idaho is that I can see the storms roll in from the west. There are no mountains to obstruct the view of the billowing dark gray rain clouds as they impede on an otherwise sunny skyline. Not only can I observe the storm coming, but I can also see the storm leave as it passes over my house and continues its journey to torment those in the eastern part of the valley. These storms happen all year long. In the winter and fall they move slowly and appear to linger; in the spring and summer they build intensely and move quickly.

Because if how my house sits, I can't always see these storms make their way towards me unless I am outside. From the inside of my home, all is well, and the weather seems beautiful. The sun is shining in the windows, and there are no clouds overhead. I don't realize what is happening in the world around me until I get ready to leave my house. One day last fall I pulled my car out of the garage, with it's concealing blind spot, to come face to face with what was happening in the world outside. As I looked ahead through the window of my car, what was coming was in stark contrast to what I thought was. I remember thinking to myself that those dark clouds had forgotten to check in with Scott Dorval or Rick Lance the local news channel meteorologists, for they had assured us that the rain and cooler temperatures would not be here until the next day.

I had this brief fleeting thought before I started driving towards those black clouds; these types of storms happen every day in life. Sometimes you can see the storm coming and are prepared, and other times it comes out of nowhere. I remember wondering if those clouds represented any meaning for myself that day. I wondered if there were any storms brewing in my life? Was what I thought was happening going to turn out to be much, much different? Usually, most of us can weather whatever storms come our way; those we know about and those we don't. Sometimes we can push through some really big ones, only to find ourselves overwhelmed and flooded by what seems like a small one. Sometimes we have what appears to be endless sunny skies with no worries, and the storms make us angry or resentful, because we really like the sunny skies. There are days that I welcome the darkness, the wind, and the rain because I know something better is on the other side, and other times when I would just rather not. I feel too tired, too battered to withstand even one more rain drop.

Some people feel abandoned or singled out when rough weather hits their life. They feel like the God of heaven and earth has singled them out, that he derives some great sense of sadistic satisfaction from watching their anguish and suffering. They ask unanswerable questions such as "why?" or "how could God turn his back on me like this?" This makes sense to me; I can see why they would ask these questions. For me, I learned a long time ago that there is never a satisfactory question to why. Nor has God ever turned his back on my . .not that it hasn't happened the other way a time or two. I have learned that no matter what . . .my job is to remain faithful through the storm, because He is there no matter what. He sees me, He hears me, and He understands. Life is life. It comes with some beautiful days, it comes with some dangerous days, it comes with some very stormy days. What a beautiful mess.